Having the confidence to take risks and to stay the course when things feel daunting and scary begins with knowledge. Your very own "insiders knowledge" on how you really think and feel about things. It starts with shining a light on your own saboteur; getting to know what triggers it to show up; learning what it's dysfunctional little habits… Continue reading What’s Up With Self-Sabotage?
So many high-achieving women strive for this impossible state of being. But trying to do things perfectly takes much more than it can ever give: It robs your time, energy and sanity and doesn't make you happier or richer. But there's a way out. 10 ways in fact.
I like to think in more positive terms about what it is I want 2022 to look and feel like. That means sitting down (or walking or whatever gets your mental juices flowing) and consciously deciding on the areas of your life you want to make the most impact on. And that impact doesn't have to be monumental. It can be subtle, barely perceptible shifts in the way you think, feel, act and plan.
In order to write this article I've spent a great deal of time thinking about and researching work+life fit, and looking for examples of severe work+life dysfunction among business women with family obligations who feel like they're barely treading water.
I refuse to refer to the transition that occurs for most women in midlife as a "crisis." While it's true that the word "crisis" means a crucial or decisive point or situation, or a turning point, it also has about it an air of instability bordering on hysteria.
Like so many women I interviewed about how it felt to be moving into midlife, I experienced an uptick in my personal power, and an undeniable need to rid myself of any beliefs or expectations that were not authentically mine. I realized there needed to be a paradigm shift in the way we think about aging as a whole, but specifically how we think about women aging. It became non-negotiable - living my life with intention. And so I created this manifesto for you, the midlife woman.
Resistance and perfectionism tend to go hand in hand. So many successful, high-achieving women find themselves stalled by these confines of the mind, by the need to be Superwoman. There's a sort of pas de deux women perform between these two extremes that has them both tap dancing in place and covering the length of the dance floor (while wearing a fifty pound pack on their backs).
In Part 1, a number of different barriers that make up this labyrinth were identified: remnants of prejudice, resistance to women's leadership, leadership style, family life demands, and building professional relationships through networking. Only a small number of women have made the right combination of moves to arrive at the center of power, but for the rest there is no single turning point where their progress was diverted and the "prize" was lost.
In early 2011 I spent three months offline and out of my office recovering from extensive surgery. Truth be told, it was life-saving, life-changing surgery. And that made it non-negotiable. For women like me, non-negotiable is often the only way self-care gets done.
The truth is that women aren't turned away just as they reach the pinnacle of their career. They disappear in numerous ways leading up to that stage. The path to the C-suite is not a simple or direct path, but one that requires persistence, awareness of how they're progressing, and an ability to analyze the obstacles that lie ahead. For women who aspire to top leadership positions the routes exist, but just like a labyrinth, they are full of twists and turns - some that are expected and others that come without warning or direction.